My name is Runa

Yes! At last I've found what is the real meaning of my name. Runa...the name that I used to hate when I was younger because it was such a simple and rare name. I always wanted sophisticated girlie names like Victoria, Jennifer, Gloria or even Stephanie!

But I was stuck with the name 'Runa' and I doubt it very much that my Dad really knew the meaning of the name or where he got it when he thought of giving me that name!

And for all those years my identity got 'locked' in that simple and rare name as I struggled with poor self esteem and what to make of myself. It was only in my mid twenties that I started the serious quest of 'looking' for myself through the real meaning of my name. I mean, I didn't forsake everything else and got into the quest but I did spent ample time to search and dig for the origin and meaning of my name.

At times the interest died down and came back on and off. But in between I continued towards self discovery...So, what does 'Runa' means? It connotes two meaning in its Scandinavian origin. One is to mean 'secret lore' and two is to mean 'to flow'! Ok, so when people think of Runa (that is if they know the meaning) they would think of her as a story/tale/legend that is both mystical and mysterious or that she is like a body of water or liquid that is about to flow!?! Hmmm...does that reflect me for who I am? Maybe! Sort of! My personality is such that only those closest would know me for who I am and even that I'm still shrouded in 'mystery'! Why am I such a mystery?

I think because I have grown up not really able to trust people and so being secretive is a sort of a defense mechanism for me for self protection and preservation! Even as an adult I do not allow myself to be 'seen' too much for fear of being hurt and betrayed. It's only when I feel I can trust people that I will let them know and see me for who I am.

To flow...I always feel that there is so much good, so much love that can be poured out of my life to others but many times it doesn't happen easily. Why? Again, I think its because it has to do with trust. It does happen with the 'right' people but I also realize that I'm cautious as well. Yet I realize that at times, many times it happens almost spontaneously and often times I am amazed by what the Holy Spirit can do through me as Runa! So, really...what's in a name? Runa sounds pretty ambiguous and uncertain. Maybe I am an ambiguous and uncertain creature.

After all I love being 'invisible'...I feel safe that way! I don't like attracting too much attention to myself. I DON'T NEED such attention, after all. I'm OK with who I am...average even mediocre but never do I use it as an excuse of not discovering my full potential as a human being ;).

And to me that being normal, ordinary, run of the mill type is part of the different people created in God's image. Even mediocre and ordinary people (seemingly so to those with the 'survival of the fittest' mentality) can excel in who they are and what they are called to do! They glow in the eyes of God, not in the eyes of the world!And that's what makes it meaningful and of eternal value!

The fishermen that followed Jesus were pretty ordinary people that followed an extraordinary MASTER! Little Mother Theresa was an ordinary and simple nun but lived an extraordinary life because of the MASTER she called her true husband! Though mediocre I can live an extraordinary life because of who I've given my life to!

So, point to ponder...even if I have the most beautiful and meaningful name, yet if I choose to live my life recklessly and irresponsibly, that name won't amount to anything much only perhaps regrets and wasted years! Even if I have the most simplest of name and yet I've found the love of my life and the purpose of my existence in who God is then that's the name I can be proud of to hear as it roll from the tongue of my Heavenly Father who made me and inspired my earthly father to give me the name 'Runa'! Yes, my name is Princess Runa!!! By the way, I'm the taller one in the picture!